'Love Melts Fear' - Best of 2009: Challenge

[I'm participating in Gwen Bell's Best of 2009 Blog Challenge]

This has been a pretty challenging year. In January, when I let my wildest dreams for the year blossom, I decided that this was the year when I would become a yoga teacher and write my book. I've done both, but not without a good dose of fear.

I was afraid that my story wouldn't be good enough to make a book out of it. I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to write well enough. I was afraid that if I told my story, truthfully, people would decide that I was crazy or - worse - that I was a Drama Queen.

I still am afraid of those things. But I decided to write my book anyway.

I was afraid that I wasn't 'good enough' at yoga to be a teacher. I was afraid that no-one would want to come to my classes. I was afraid that if I started teaching my weaknesses as a yogini and as a person would be so apparent that people would decide that I was crazy or - worse - that I was a phony.

I still am afraid of those things. But I became a yoga teacher anyway.

Every time I turn up to teach a yoga class, I start over again. I hear the voices of fear. What if they don't like what you have to offer today? What if they hate it and they all leave? I tell those voices that I don't have time for them. I'm too busy feeling so much love for the people who have been brave enough to show up. I'm too busy offering them what I have to share - a very simple, very authentic practice of yoga that has given me so much.

Every time I sit down to write, I start all over again. I hear the voices of fear. What if I have nothing to say? What if all my writing is crap and no-one has been honest enough to tell me? I tell those voices that I don't have time for them. I'm too busy reaching deep inside to find the stories that demand to be told. I'm too busy feeling love for the people who trusted me with their stories, and who trusted me to share them.

My biggest challenge this year has been finding the balance between noticing where my fears were pointing me (because they have an unerring sense of direction) while not letting them paralyze me. What I've learned is that love melts fear. When I love the people in my classes enough to really want to serve them as best I can, the fear melts away.

I'm so glad that I have found my solid ground, that unshakeable place of love and peace that I can fall back into at any time, because it gives me the courage I need to keep on walking, writing, teaching and loving in the face of fear.

This post was inspired by:

• This post by Jen Lee
• Some kind words from my friend Emma; and
• 'Love Melts Fear' by my beautiful friend Edo Kahn of The Kahn Brothers

Comments

[Square-Peg Karen]

Beautiful! I love how you share the back and forth of courage (the feelings behind it all - that it's not just easy sailing) - and "love melts fear" - YES!

[Patty]

Wow. I loved this article. I can *so* relate to everything you said. Thank you for sharing.

[TheWordWire]

Love melts fear. Beautiful sentiment, and SO TRUE -- I'm going to remind myself of it the next time that emotion tries to hold me back. Appreciate the inspiration.

[fpfj]

So beautiful. This is helping me articulate my intentions for the new year.

[a.bella]

I wanted you to know that your writing has inspired and helped me a lot in the past few months as my life changed and I started a new journey raising my young son on my own. Thank you for the honesty you show in this post - and all your posts - you continue to inspire me with your journey, and your writing and stories help me to believe that I too can fulfill my wildest dreams in the face of all the fears I feel.

[floreta]

ah! that was absolutely beautiful and you're so right! i can absolutely relate. you seem to have lead a pretty amazing life.

[Swirly]

That is the definition of courage, is it not? To feel afraid, but do it anyway.

[doorways traveler]

paying attention to where it points us, but not letting it paralyze us.

and loving ourselves, and eachother, enough to melt all the fear fueled injustice in this world: that's my dream.

xoxo

[linni]

Hi Marianne,

Read all your posts now and somewhere, while reading, I remembered this quote and wanted to share it with you! xx

'When you work with love you draw others to you. Embrace this truth. the reason for this is that love is the highest vibration on earth. When you work with love people feel it, are helped by it and return to it. It's a positive vibration that draws people naturally into its sphere. let your honesty and integrity shine and be a blessing.'

[Christianne]

"I tell those voices that I don't have time for them. I'm too busy feeling so much love for the people who have been brave enough to show up ... I tell those voices that I don't have time for them. I'm too busy reaching deep inside to find the stories that demand to be told."

I found these lines so inspiring. You speak a truth I have been discovering, too. When we focus on love, everything else that would cloud our vision and shake us down fades away. We gather a strength that moves us toward others and finds us railing back at those voices that would discourage and hinder us from what we are meant to do.

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[Lily Yago]

do it anyway